Two Days and Counting

It’s been two days since my grandfather’s funeral. It’s not easy. I think it’s actually harder now that the funeral has taken place. It’s definitely not a good idea to go and see musicians who play sad music the day after your grandfather’s funeral – unless you enjoy crying in public places.
The funeral was nice – there was a little bit of Catholic tradition in the service but the majority of it was United Church based. We had a Catholic father perform the catholic part (he also performed last rites on the night my grandfather dies, and performed most of the prayer service at the visitation on Thursday). The United Church minister has known our family for 30+ years so knew my grandfather very well. I’m glad she was there for us and she did an excellent job.
Following the funeral we had a light lunch with friends and family. Then we interred the body at the graveyard (since the gravesite was an hours drive from the funeral home). The grandsons were the pallbearers – of which I was the eldest grandson. Grandpa was buried with a bottle of beer, a plaque stating “Ain’t no beer in heaven have to drink it here” and a Lukken (Belgian Waffle Cookie) made by my cousin using my grandfather’s cookie irons. This was the hardest part of the day – the realization that he was gone and we would never see him again. Only in our heart and pictures.
Following the interment people went back to my parents place. The atmosphere was more like a wake than a get together after a party. Alcohol was drunk, music was played, stories were told. It was something my grandfather would have enjoyed. He would have approved.
Firda and I stopped at the grave the day after the funeral. I wanted to make sure that everything had been cleaned up and that his body was safe and sound.
Even though I know he isn’t in pain any more, and he is at rest, it doesn’t mean I don’t want his to still be alive and healthy. It will take time for me to get over the pain I feel at losing him. The sadness comes and goes. Today’s been a difficult day but they will get easier. LIfe moves on.
And I want to thank Firda for being there for me during this past week of funerals and for scanning close to 100 pictures of my grandfather for the visitation slide show. I know the whole family appreciated it. Thank you 🙂

4 Replies to “Two Days and Counting”

  1. Wow. Again, I’m so sorry for your losses, Troy.
    Since I was the last of her blood relatives, I received all of my grandmother’s pictures from babyhood to just a month before she passed away. I was organizing them the other day, and I set one from when she was a baby next to that last one and had a good cry.
    Life really is precious.
    Take the time you need to grieve. It’s so important.
    I’m glad you have Firda there to help you through this time.
    -H

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